Welcome to our glorious new Kingdom

Everything is fine here. 

There are no food banks, no kids who struggle to develop, no drugs problems, no one on the street, no racism, no religious intolerance, not even between Christians, no increase in rental, no rotten food on sale, no polluted rivers and lakes and land and cities.

Everything's cleaned and well ordered. 

New (or good as new) barges are being commissioned by OUR BELOVED STATE to welcome foreigners who wish to settle into the land. A perfect solution. With a bit of luck, some will walk in their sleeps or just jump straight ahead. No need for coffins and other funeral expenses. Straight into the water. Clean.

                   "Catamaran Barge at Olmsted Locks and Dam" by LouisvilleUSACE is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

Clean streets. SECURE STREETS. Some criminals were about to cause a lot of damage on the day of the coronation of our new GREAT KING – long may he reign even if it is only for 15 years maximum, WE THE SERFS, THE CLERGE AND THE WARLORDS (apart from the non-doms) ARE HAPPY TO SWEAR THE OATH AND PAY FOR ALL ROYAL EXPENSES. The odious criminals about to commit a horrific LESE-MAJESTE act were arrested thanks our efficient and forever perfect PRECRIME SQUADS.

Another terrible criminal, a French man (despite our GLORIOUS BREXIT they dare to come here) was arrested. He was an employee of a French editing house (the AUDACITY!) and was safely and lovingly looked after by our WONDERFUL INTELLIGENCE SERVICE.

The whole nation, but in particular its pervs, adored the carrying of a sword by a copy of Catherine Deneuve called PENNY MORDOR who was wearing a very touching outfit à la Hunger Game. Thanks to this powerful action HAVING MUSCLE IS LIFE, Ms Mordor may become the new head of OUR GLORIOUS PARTY. 


                  "Treasures from Medieval York - The Cawood Sword" by vintagedept is licensed under CC BY 2.0

 

ALL IS WELL IN THE KINGDOM. Repeat after me: ALL IS WELL IN THE KINGDOM

                ALL IS WELL IN THE KINGDOM!

 


                                   Alfred, about to be eaten by a big drone. Photo credits: moi

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